Posts Tagged "poop"

Chronicles of Poop

Posted by Michelle on Jan 16, 2011 in Parenting | 4 comments

Pure, calculating mischief hides behind that cute mask

Last night The Little Empress suddenly ran to me after a period of quiet, crying plaintively, “Mommy?”

This scenario, in and of itself, is of course not new and has undoubtedly played itself out, millions of times a day in  homes across the world.

(I just hope that what happens next doesn’t happen to most. Though I’m sure it has happened to a good percentage, anyway.)

“Yes?” I asked, blinking as I noticed she was holding up her finger. “Are you okay?” I inspected the finger, which looked to be completely normal to me from a distance.

“Finger yucky!” TLE insisted, reaching my lap and burying her face in my knee. She held up her finger to me. “YUCKY!!”

TLE is notorious for not liking anything sticky or goopy on her fingers but I didn’t think she had access to anything with that texture at the moment. Before I could ask what she’d gotten in to, she sniffed and said, “Euw. Poopoo.”

I eyed her. “What do you mean ‘poopoo’?” I asked suspiciously.

In answer, she patted her bottom and this time shoved her finger into my face. “POOPOO!” she cried, triumphantly this time.

Needless to say, I screamed and took her upstairs to change her diaper… keeping said finger far, far from me.

Meanwhile, TLE cackled wildly the entire time. Oh kid, if there wasn’t a better reason for you to get potty trained, this would be it.

Speech delay? What speech delay?

Posted by Michelle on Dec 28, 2010 in Life, Parenting, Therapy | 0 comments

Out of the mouth of babes

I’ve been meaning to write about how The Little Empress’ vocabulary has really exploded in the last two months. Almost overnight, she began repeating more and more words and using new ones that we didn’t even realize she knew.  I attribute a lot of this to the visit with her cousins over Thanksgiving as well as the sheer amount of time we’ve been spending with her since then. The gain has been so significant, in fact, that I’m almost worried that she won’t qualify for speech through the school district anymore.

But all this was just leading up to tonight. Folks,  we just had a milestone of epic proportions. And what was that, you ask?

My lovely, darling daughter turned to me and proudly said, “Oh no! I farted, Mommy!”

Yep. As far s I’m concerned, she’s totally caught up to other preschoolers.

Obligatory Epic Poop Post

Posted by Michelle on Aug 12, 2010 in Conversations, Life, Observations, Parenting | 0 comments

What evil lurks beyond this grin?

• Michelle: OOOOOOOOOOMFG.
• Michelle: DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR DAUGHTER JUST DID
• Michelle: She came up to me and was like, “Baby euw. Baby euw.”
• Michelle: She had a full diaper. So I was like, “Okay, I’ll change it in a second.”
• Michelle: She keeps tapping my shoulder. “Baby euw. Baby euw.”
• Michelle: Then she PUTS HER FULL DIAPER ON MY ARM.
• Michelle: SHE DONE TOOK IT OFF. POOP AND ALL.
• The Hubs ™: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*SOB*AHAHAHAHA
• Michelle: I realized that she was telling me — “BIG BIG EUW! BIG BIG EUW!”
• The Hubs ™: If I could praise her from here, I would.
• Michelle: YOU SUCK.
• The Hubs ™: <3

ADDENDA: Poop was (thankGOD) contained within said diaper. But still. OMFG EUW.