Posts Tagged "guilt"

The Princesa Problema

Posted by Michelle on Mar 22, 2010 in Life, Parenting | 0 comments

One thing that you should probably know about me if you plan on reading this blog is that I am rabidly anti-princess. Or at least, mostly anti-princess. I don’t hate all princesses, just useless ones. And by useless, I mean the princesses that wouldn’t lift a finger to help themselves, waiting for their prince or knight to come. Gag me. Give me Wonder Woman any day.

I could write an essay about why I dislike princesses so much but suffice to say that both The Hubs ™ and myself are rabid feminists. We prefer the idea of equal opportunity, meaning that in our world, the Princess is the one hacking and slashing her way from the Dragon’s Lair rather than languishing away in the tower, waiting for the good Sir Knight to rescue her. (Or who knows, they could meet halfway, kill the dragon together and then go out to dinner. Sounds plausible, yes?)

Self Rescuing Princess

I’m happy to report that The Little Empress is well on her way to being her own self-rescuing princess. Whether this is because of our influence or the fact that she’s just rabidly independent, I don’t know. Either way, I’m grateful.

There is a downside to being so anti-princess. Because just about everything for little girls is princess themed, it is practically impossible to escape. For TLE’s birthday, my mom presented TLE with two mylar balloons, one festooned with Sesame Street’s Elmo and the other with Disney’s Tinkerbell. TLE loves balloons so of course, she squealed with happiness. (Note to everyone: want to be a toddler’s hero? Buy them a bunch of balloons. Easy, cheap present to make you the BESTEST. PERSON. EVER.)

My mom giggled happily about how Tinkerbell was a “princess” and that TLE was a “princess” and that she wanted her to have some princessy thing. This, of course, triggered what I shall somewhat ashamedly call my Princess!Growl. I started a diatribe about how horrible the old school Disney princesses were and how I didn’t want TLE being exposed to such things. I talked about how horrified I was during a recent trip to Barnes & Noble’s Kid Section where TLE picked up a singing Disney princess book that sang “Here Comes the Bride”.

And then my mom got quiet. She said she didn’t know how much I didn’t like princesses. I felt bad and quickly said that Tinkerbell was okay, since she wasn’t a princess and was spunky, like TLE.  Then my mom brightened a little.

It wasn’t until later that I discovered that my mom had bought TLE a singing Disney princess card.

*pause*

Well… sh*t.

Sometimes,  sticking up for I think is best for my child makes me feel like the worst child in the world to my own parents.

Better late than never

Posted by Michelle on Mar 11, 2010 in Parenting, Therapy | 0 comments

While I’ve alluded to the fact that The Little Empress is turning out to be slow to speak, I have been a bit hesitant to talk about it openly. The reasons for this are varied but a lot of it comes down to guilt and feeling like I have somehow failed her as a mother. But I realize that hiding and avoiding a situation only tends to aggravate worry than alleviate it. Rather than worry in private, I figure that it is time to start talking about it and document what steps we will be taking to help TLE overcome it.

The Little Empress had begun to babble pretty early on in infancy and I was always sure that her first word was just around the corner. By 12 months she still had not uttered her first word but I was not worried — surely it was coming soon. But when her 18 month birthday slipped by without “Mama” or “Dada”, I began to get concerned. At her well child check at 18 months, our family doctor wasn’t particularly worried as TLE was obviously alert, curious and capable of understanding what was going on around her.

By about 22 months old, TLE’s had developed a small vocabulary, main filled with simple, two syllable words and a few garbled phrases. Though I’d promised myself that I wouldn’t gauge TLE’s development by comparing her to other children her age, I double checked her development against widely accepted milestones for her age. By my unprofessional estimates, her vocabulary was behind though her comprehension was about where it should be. I asked around online, seeking advice from other Moms. Several Moms advised me to look into early intervention programs through the county. After doing some research online, I found the early intervention specialists in our area.