Posts made in March, 2010

Prelude to School

Posted by Michelle on Mar 31, 2010 in Family, Home Matters, Life, Parenting | 0 comments

Whew! I haven’t been to this much school since I graduated! I had to bring TLE’s immunization records and fill out some paperwork before she officially starts school next week. The director suggested bringing TLE along to let her get a better feel for her future classmates.

As soon as we walked up to the center, TLE jumped around  excitedly to see the playground. There are two playgrounds at the center, each with different apparatus to help the kids with their motor function. Luckily, we were asked to come around playtime so TLE was able to join abunch of the kids on the playground. Then we moved inside and I worked on filling out paperwork while TLE had the very important task of trying out all the toys they have to offer.

The director filled me more on the program and gave me the breakdown of the class schedule as I filled out paperwork. There is a lot of free play as well as structured play to help the kids develop whatever skills they may be behind on. She also informed me of the open door policy — basically, I can sit in on the class whenever I want. This may just ease my Mommy-guilt.

We stayed for about an hour. TLE was allowed to roam the classroom, playing with whatever struck her fancy. And just about everything struck her fancy. She zipped from activity to activity, playing with blocks, the play kitchen, toy cars, balls, etc. I liked  seeing how the teachers played with her, how they really got down to her level and explained things to her. The class is very small, maybe 8 kids to 2 teachers as well as additional volunteer aides and specialized therapists.

Later in the day, we attended an open house at the co-op preschool that I want to send her to when she turns three. Cooperative preschools are almost entirely parent run, with one paid teacher. I love this model since it is a perfect bridge between homeschooling and traditional schooling. There’s only one co-op preschool in the area so I want to be sure to get her name down as soon as possible. She loved the classroom and while she’s still too young to sign up for the upcoming school year, I’ll definitely have her name down for 2011.

I had a few concerns about preschool, especially since there’s no telling if she’ll still be delayed by the time she turns three. One of the parents that I talked to eased my fears. Apparently, this co-op is where the school district recommends for children who have aged out of the county early intervention program. Lucky! So either way, TLE would likely end up going to this co-op which makes me happy.

What doesn’t make me happy is the fact that I don’t know what we’ll be doing for elementary school. There’s an elementary school just a half mile walk from our home but I refuse to send TLE there. Unless TLE settles down a lot in the next few years (doubtful), I think that putting her in an overcrowded classroom will kill any chance she has academically. I remember being in a crowded classroom in elementary school and being frustrated that I wasn’t being called upon. (Yes, I was the annoying kid that always had her hand up.) Teachers said that I was disruptive or uninterested. Nothing could be further from the truth. I was frustrated and bored out of my skull because I wasn’t getting the attention I needed. If possible, I don’t want to put TLE in a similar situation.

There are two very popular charter academies in our school district but there’s a waiting list a mile long. It is all lottery and the idea that there’s nothing I can do to ensure that my daughter gets a good education makes me sick. All I can do is put her name down and pray really hard that she gets in. Otherwise, homeschooling becomes our other option. Luckily, there’s homeschooling through the district, which provides curriculum as well as teacher guidance once a month, which ensures that TLE would be following the same curriculum as her public schooled peers. Still, I’d rather that she was in the charter but I guess we’ll deal with that when it is time.

Double Overtime

Posted by Michelle on Mar 26, 2010 in Breastfeeding, Parenting | 3 comments

International Breastfeeding Symbol

When I made the decision to breastfeed The Little Empress, I would have never believed that I would still be nursing two years later. At 24 months old, The Little Empress is just as attached to the boob as she ever was.

I’ve been asked by several people when I plan on weaning her. The short answer is: I don’t. As a stay at home mom with no health reasons to stop breastfeeding (ie. starting medication, etc.) I simply see no real reason to stop breastfeeding. Plus, TLE may be my only little one — why wouldn’t I want to extend this as long as possible? Once we’re done, there’s no getting this time back. If neither of us are ready for this part of our lives to be over, then why rush it?

That being said, I’m not against nightweaning. I had reached such a level of sleep deprivation due to all night breastaurant buffet runs that I  resolved to nightwean her. We tried twice: once at 19 months and again at 22 months. To say she resisted would be putting it nicely; even two months after the last attempt, I’m still shell shocked by the amount of screaming involved. We used Dr. Jay Gordon’s method which is a gradual nightwean while still allowing for co-sleeping that has worked well for countless AP families. Sadly, The Little Empress’ will outlasted my own twice so it failed. (She screamed so much in protest that we all ended up losing more sleep.The kicker is that I never left her while she was screaming but boy howdy, was she mad!) I’ll probably try again in another month or two, once she’s adjusted to school.

Of course, this doesn’t mean that I let her nurse whenever she wants. Until now, TLE has been under the assumption that my boobies somehow belong to her and she’ll be damned if she’s not allowed access. As a baby, it was cute but as a toddler, it has gotten downright annoying. While I love the closeness that extended nursing brings to us both, power struggles over who owns the boobies are decidedly not fun. I’m starting to set stricter limits on when she can and can’t nurse. She is slowly but surely beginning to recognize when I’m serious about NOT letting her nurse. She can tantrum all she wants — boobie doesn’t come out just because she wants it to.

While I never hesitated to nurse her in public as a baby, I’m less apt to do so as a toddler. This has mostly to do with the fact that she has this annoying habit of playing with the non-nursing breast. And by playing with it, I mean full on, toddler palming grope with nipple twists. I have tried like hell to stop it, all with no luck. I don’t embarrass all that easily but having a nursing toddler practically undress you in the middle of a restaurant while copping a feel for the world to see is pretty damn embarrassing, even for me.

There are days when she’ll nurse more than 10 times a day and others when she’ll nurse only to nap and sleep. Sometimes I’m fine with being a human feedbag and others, I can barely stand to be touched. But I try to keep an open mind about it, reminding myself that there will come a day when she is no longer nursing and I’ll look back on these days and laugh.

TLE nursing @ 23mo

I wonder if I will be looking back on this entry in a year with a still nursing preschooler… or a weaned one.

Starting school

Posted by Michelle on Mar 25, 2010 in Life, Parenting, Therapy | 1 comment

Here’s an update on The Little Empress’ speech issues that I mentioned before. I spoke with our case manager who put me in touch with a not-so-local children services center that works with developmentally delayed kids. (Not-so-local as in it isn’t as close as I’d like but certainly within a reasonable driving distance.) All in all, I’d say that it has taken about a month and a half to two months of paperwork and waiting to get the ball rolling on her therapy. From what I’ve found with other families that qualified for Early Intervention services, this seems to be about average.

We made an appointment to meet with the coordinator and take a tour of the facilities which seemed nice. TLE roamed the classroom while the coordinator explained the program. Basically it is a modified preschool program, five days a week, for kids ages 18 months to 3 years with some sort of developmental delay. Everything about it is like daycare or preschool for tots, with specialists to help them address their developmental challenges. Some kids in the program have speech delays, like TLE, while others may have motor or cognitive delays. We have another appointment next week to fill out paperwork and let TLE get acclimated to the environment before she officially starts school the day after Easter.

Wow. She’ll be starting school at the age of 2. I can just hear her screeching later on in life that her parents put her in school as a toddler, not even waiting until she was preschool aged. Sure, it is a modified school and specifically to address her speech delay but still, technically is school.

To be honest, I have mixed feelings about this. I worry about TLE being in an environment that is completely foreign to her. She hasn’t been away from me for more than two hours, at most, since I’ve been home. Her separation anxiety has gotten better but will she adjust quickly to the new environment? The coordinator assured me that all kids cry but will get used to the separation from their parents.

When I heard “group therapy” suggested, I had assumed that I would be with her. The idea of sending her off for care for a good chunk of the day had not occurred to me as an option. It got me thinking — what if being at home wasn’t the best idea for her? Is being at home with me the cause of her speech delay? Would she have fared better if we had put her in a mixed care environment like day care? And with these thoughts came the self doubts — am I a bad mother?

Since the school is about 15 miles from home, I’ll probably be better off finding a place to hunker down for a few hours than going home. Suddenly, I have a few hours to myself which is something I’ve been wishing for awhile now. I can work again, maybe do more than two or three pieces a week. With enough discipline, I can finish my first novel draft like I’ve been hoping to by June. I find myself excited, giddy even, with the thought of a few hours to relax with a cup of coffee and a stack of novel notes.

Then I sober at the thought of leaving my little one for hours in the care of strangers. Nice, well trained strangers but strangers to me nonetheless. I wasn’t planning on having her start school so soon. But I know that, at this point in time, it is for the best.

For now, she’s eligible for 6 months of therapy, to be reevaluated in September on her progress. Children age out of the program at 3 years old and then it is onto the school district. Hopefully she’ll catch up by then. But we’ll see how it goes.

For moms with mutts…

Posted by Michelle on Mar 25, 2010 in Internet, Life, Linky Love, Media | 1 comment

I find this downright adorable…

Dog Sings To Soothe Crying Baby – Watch more Funny Videos

This dog is a lot more helpful than Miyuki was in the first days! Miyuki would pace back and forth, panicking, until someone got the baby to stop crying. Eventually, she just learned to retreat to the bathroom and cover her ears.

Infantino Recalls to Replace SlingRider Baby Slings; Three Infant Deaths Reported

Posted by Michelle on Mar 24, 2010 in Babywearing | 6 comments

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) and Health Canada (HC), in cooperation with Infantino LLC, of San Diego, Calif. are announcing a free replacement program for the Infantino “SlingRider” and “Wendy Bellissimo” infant slings. One million of these infant slings are being recalled in the United States and 15,000 are being recalled in Canada. CPSC advises consumers to immediately stop using these slings for infants younger than four months of age due to a risk of suffocation and contact Infantino for a free replacement product.

Read the full press release from the CPSC here.

I am a huge proponent of babywearing — a carried baby is a happy baby, after all. I have seen these SlingRider slings in action and was appalled at how far a baby can fall into them. I am glad to see that they’ve been taken off the market. My only hope is that this recall will not scare folks away from babywearing.